Sometimes I feel like I don't connect with my youngest son as well as my oldest son. I guess it's just that first verses second child I don't know but it bugs me. I try to be the best dad to both my boys that I can be and don't like coming up short with either one of them. When Chase was young he wanted to do everything Cody did and it seemed all was well.
But as he has gotten older his interests have changed and they have grown into there own persons. As a parent that's what you want. But as a parent I have to learn to adjust with them. With Cody it seems easy, he rides bikes and does a lot of the same things I do. With Chase he did all the same things until he got a few years older and started finding his own things.
For awhile I tried to keep him headed the same way Cody was going, all that did was aggravate me. Then I realized he had his own ideals. Ideals that are so out of the ordinary for me that it's been hard for me to adjust. His main interest, music! I can't sing and sure as hell can't play the piano or guitar. I can buy them though and I have done that well.
But that doesn't count! So sometimes I feel guilty for not being able to relate to him better. That's been one plus to Cody being gone, I have more time to spend one on one with Chase. I don't want to say it's been hard cause that's not the case! But it's not something that has happened over night either. It's not something you can rush.
Also don't think for minute that I don't have a relationship with my youngest son I just want to have a better relationship with both of them! Right now I am just lucky enough to have a 9 month period to work on bettering things with Chase as my focus.
So far it's helped! Last week we sat around one evening and watched a music documentary on one of his favorite groups and had a good evening. Then Saturday I got to enjoy a day on the ski slopes with just Chase as he learned how to snowboard! After I got back from Pennsylvania last time and talked about skiing with Cody Chase had said he would like to learn. So I made it happen!
We rented equipment for him this time and now we are going to buy him his own stuff. He loved it and wants to go back. Hopefully next year the 3 of us will be spending a lot of time up in the NC mountains doing a bunch of skiing. I can't wait!
The damnedest thing is with Cody away at school I have Chase all to my self and I seem to talk to Cody more now than I ever have. We talk 2-3 times a week for at least a half hour or so every time. If I don't do anything right in life I hope being the best dad I can possibly be is my greatest accomplishment!!! I love my kids and make every effort to show them.
Saturday night was an awesome time with Chase..........